A Distraught Harry
by WolfUnderTheMoon
Summary: Ah, the mysteries of a life at Hogwarts. What would happen if everything turned upsidedown? ok, so not literally!


A Distraught Harry

We're all perfectly normal, thankyou very much!

Harry lay on his bed in the boy's dormitory, staring at the ceiling. Why did everything always happen to him? What had he done to deserve all of this? He had lay like this, day after day, ever since Ginny had left him. She had run away with Cho Chang, that stupid blonde bimbo. He didn't fancy her a bit (at least not as much) since she'd dyed her hair, it looked awful. Really didn't go with the nose-ring.

He heaved himself up off the bed, finally feeling hungry after 1 week of starvation rations. Thinking of nose-rings made him think of pigs, and bacon. Mmm, breakfast. The empty foil packets from his rations still lay on his bedside table, the contents drawn in pretty patterns on the walls. He'd always loved the colour pink. It had been his first word. Of course, the Dursleys were disappointed; they had hoped it would be something normal like; "ah yes, and exactly how many drills would you like to order, Mr. Mason?"

Harry ran slowly down to breakfast through the greenness, pretending he was walking on the moon. He came across Snape in the corridors, smiled and waved to his favourite teacher, who winked back, and waded on. Those swamps the Weasleys had were brilliant.

Harry reached the great hall and sat down on his reclining armchair. Since the mass hickeying of many of the students by a crazed McGonagall, many had run away and caught the Knight Bus, though a few had come back, preferring unsightly red marks to week-long vomiting as they tried to reach Timbuktu. The lack of many students meant the school had been able to splash out a bit, so they had bout ten microwaves and an electric fire, as well as fifteen reclining chairs!

He then had a hearty breakfast of rice wafers, and settled back, comfortable and replete. Dumbledore, up at the top table, did the same.

"Aah yes, that's better. Now, what lessons do you have today Harry?"

"Um…." Harry opened his rucksack and pulled out a luminous orange and pink timetable. "I've got Divination with Professor Trelawney, then Herbology with Professor Sprout, sir."

Dumbledore heaved himself off his recliner, and came over to where Harry was sitting. "Harry…."

"Yes sir?"

"Why are all your Divination lessons outlined in flashing red hearts?"

Harry blushed and hung his head, grinning and muttering to himself.

"Ah, I see."

Harry held up his head again, "It's nothing really sir, please don't tell her!"

"Don't worry, I won't. I am well acquainted with the ways of young love. Watching your friend Ron following Seamus round like a demented puppy has been sickening."

"Yeah…."

Harry departed for his first lesson. Ah, how he loved Divination. And Professor Trelawney, her glasses magnifying her beautiful eyes, how lovely she looked. Harry sighed.

"Aaaahh…."

Ron caught up with him. "Where've you been mate? I thought we were having breakfast with Hagrid today!"

Harry started. "Oh no, I forgot! Oh, Hagrid'll never forgive me!"

"He seemed a bit put out, but he'll be ok."

"Good, I hope so."

They had reached the trapdoor. The silver ladder descended, so they ascended. Harry looked around. There were crystal balls on each of the tables, Neville's cracked from the last lesson. He really need to learn to control his temper, throwing balls across the room. Not just crystal ones, either. Finally getting Crabbe and Goyle, without help and at the same time, had swelled his ego so much that Harry didn't think it would fit through the trapdoor any more. And he was right. He could see from where he was standing a brown-haired head, partly squashed through the hole in the floor, and went over and yelled at it to see if he could help.

"Neville? You OK?"

"Does it look like it? Oh god, I'll have to have my lesson down in the corridor again. The Bloody Baron always seems to hang round, he just stares at me all the time…."

"Maybe he likes you, Neville."

"Yeah, maybe. I mean, he is quite a catch, very mysterious if you get my drift….well, could you help me?"

Harry conjured up a plunger with his wand, attached it to the swollen head and pushed it back down again, securing the latch after it. And now back to his favourite pastime. Trelawney-gazing. Ah, bliss.

The end of the lesson, time for break. Harry straightened himself out, stretching from his time spent curled up on a pouffe. He pulled Ron after him, who was still staring at Seamus open-mouthed, catching flies, tripped over a nail in the floorboards, and soared headfirst through the trapdoor. He landed and rubbed it, thankful that he had landed on his head and not his behind, as his head was much softer and less valuable. Untangling Ron from the ladder rungs took some time, but a few hours later it was lunch and they were off down to the lake, taking a light snack of a whole roast pig in a bun. The boys took a couple of grilled pigeons with them incase they got hungry on the way, and went down to the lake, where hopefully Hermione would have returned from her latest date with the giant squid. Things couldn't be better.

Oh yeah, apart from the fact that Sirius is dead, Voldemort and all his death eaters are on the loose still, and, of course, Harry has History of Magic homework to hand in late. Again.


End file.
